Aww honey. The first time a guy asked me to be on top, I was a skinny, skinny little thing, and I felt exactly the same way you do … what the hell do I do now?! I was sooo embarrassed. And then, god help me, after a couple minutes, he actually said I was boring him. So. That brings me to my first question: Did he do or say something rotten to make your night so horrible and embarrassing? Or was it one of those things where stuff doesn't go right and you're just embarrassed in your own mind? Because if he did something inconsiderate, he doesn't deserve the effort you're putting into this whole thing…

Now, if he didn't do anything rude, I've thankfully learned a few things since I was a skinny, embarassed girl—and I asked a couple friends for feedback too, from both the male and female perspective … because girl-on-top still isn't my fave position. ;-)

So, first off, keep this in mind: If he wants you to get on top, it's definitely partly because he likes looking at you. Never mind the movies and magazines, most guys like a woman with some curves! :-) So (even though I know it sounds impossible when you don't have much experience—and it sometimes is, even to skinny girls) try not to worry about how you look. He wants you up on top, remember? That means he wants to look at you! Also, try buying a sexy little teddy or babydoll to wear, if you're still worried about how you're going to look… it's amazing what a sexy little piece of lingerie can do for a girl's confidence.

Now, let's assume you're about to go ahead and give him his wish… If you enjoy giving blow jobs, kneel down between his legs and do that as soon as he rolls over on his back. He's gotta like that, and it gives you a chance to get him all hot and bothered before you have to take over the spotlight. ;-) Then, craaaaawl up his body, and rub his cock all over yourself on the way up. That'll keep him hot and bothered! Then, once you're up on top, tease him a little before you put him all the way inside. Grab his dick and rub it against yourself, or kneel just above him, and grab his hands and put them where you want them (or put them in a place you already know he likes to feel around), and make him wait for it a little.

Once you're actually into it, I've found it's really easy to get the guy to help you out. You don't have to just bounce and grind around while he lays there like a blow up doll. When girls do that, guys call them a "dead lay". Why let him get away with being a dead lay if you're not?! Grab his hands and hold them on your hips, and then grind into him a little … most guys will get the hint and start thrusting back. Then it's all just a matter of timing your bouncing, twisting or grinding to match his thrusting. Now he's doing at least half the work, and you don't feel like you're standing naked on stage while he watches!

After all that, if you're still not really comfortable, you can always switch things up a little. Instead of kneeling over him, you could try getting up on one foot and one knee, so you're kind of crouching (might be easier on the knees!). You could lean forward and kiss him for a minute, while you do some of that slow hip rolling you mentioned. Or, instead of him laying flat on his back the whole time, you could ask him to sit up too, so you're kind of sitting in his lap (if he crosses his legs, and you wrap your legs around behind his back, it can be seriously fantastic).

Most of all, try not to put so much pressure on yourself. Sometime when you're alone, try fantasizing about what being on top would be like if you were super confident and having a great time… then try doing some of the things you imagine. And I really hope some of this helps out!

Much thanks to Carnivalesq and Heiko for their assistance on this one!

The very first ever post on this site was about penis size … and for the most part, the same advice and information goes for vaginas too. There's no such thing as a "fat" or "molded" vagina, any more than a guy can make himself bigger by pulling harder when he jerks off. Different women come in different sizes, inside and out. Some girls have bigger vaginas than others, just like some guys have bigger penises than others. Also, if your boyfriend wants to have sex with you more than once a week, it's a good bet he's not bothered by the size of your vagina!

Best of all, vaginas have one MAJOR advantage over penises in the size department: We can improve our muscle tone with Kegel exercises, so our vaginas can squeeze down harder, and feel "tighter" while we're squeezing. (Another bonus of Kegels: Well-toned pelvic floor muscles make orgasms better for you too!) Also, your vagina actually changes during different times of the month! Most women tend to be wetter and looser while they're ovulating, and tighter (but with less lubrication) right after their period.

So, I have two pieces of advice for you: 1. Don't worry about it! You are the size you are, and if it doesn't bother your boyfriend during sex, why let it bother you? (BUT!!! If you ever DO have a boyfriend who complains about your size, just tell him it's not your fault he has a small penis and dump his ungrateful ass!) 2. Start doing Kegel exercises. Every woman benefits from keeping herself in shape, inside and out! Kegels are really simple to do, and you can do them any time, anywhere. To learn how to do them, try this next time you go pee: squeeze like you're trying to "hold it in", and see if you can stop the flow of urine. That's it!

If you have some money to spend, you could even buy a Kegel exercise toy like Fun Factory's SmartBalls. You put them in like a big tampon, and your muscles work to hold the balls in, auto-magically toning your PC (pelvic floor) muscles while you wear them! They make exercising your PC muscles a little more fun, but vaginal balls definitely aren't required to get the benefits of doing Kegels.

I can't help but wonder if your boyfriend fretted for days over how he was going to taste before he let you give him a blow job, Anonymous? ;-) I'm betting he probably didn't. And there's no reason for you to worry either!

Every woman tastes different, so there's not one "way" you're supposed to taste. Not to mention, if your boyfriend is turned on by the idea of going down, odds are he'll be turned on by the way you taste and smell down there too!

I'm sure eating lots of strawberries and drinking plenty of water probably influences your taste the same way it does for a man (yes, eating strawberries for a few days DOES make semen taste better!), but as long as you don't have any STIs or infections and you wash regularly, there shouldn't be any problem. You could skip the asparagus & cabbage that week, and hope it makes a difference, but I'm sure you'll be fine no matter what you eat as long as you're sensible enough to put on clean underwear every day. ;-)

Pleasurists is a round-up of the adult product and sex toy reviews that came out in the last seven days from bloggers all around the sex blogosphere. Did you miss Pleasurists #38? Read it all here. Do you have a review for Pleasurists #40? Submit it here before Sunday August 2nd at 11:59pm PDT. Please re-post this list on your own blog if listed.

Want to win some free swag? All you’ve got to do is enter.

• Glass Dildos Galore! Deadline: July 31, 2009 at 11:59 p.m. PDT.
• Tantus Giveaway! Deadline: August 8th at 11:59 pm PDT.
• Steal our Blog and win $100 Deadline: August 28th.
• Hello Kitty Vibe photo contest Deadline: September 1, 2009.

Madame Editrix
Scarlet Lotus St. Syr

On to the reviews…

Editor’s Pick

• JimmyJane Form 6 by Joan Price

What makes a vibrator worth $185? Granted, that’s a lot of money for a vibrator. The Jimmyjane Form 6 Waterproof Rechargeable Vibrating Massager is a luxury item, a sexy gift for the sensual woman in your life (maybe yourself!), and it gives a lot back for that price.

Editor’s Note: As I was informed of in the additional message when this review was submitted: “Joan Price’s blog celebrates sex after 60. Her reviews reflect the perspective of sex-positive seniors and elders.” How could I not highlight a great review and a blog whose subject matter is wonderful albeit somewhat unusual to see?

Vibrators

• Gallant by Beautiful Dreamer
• Boss Lady by Ms M.
• Waterproof Rabbit by Bad Bad Girl
• Fantasy Fire by Laurel
• Ideal & G-Plus by Beautiful Dreamer
• Emotional Bliss Womolia Heat by Sexorcism
• King of Victory by Amorous Rocker
• Icegasm by Domina Doll
• Siena Symphony by Bad Bad Girl
• Icegasm Kit by Adriana
• Womolia by Coy Pink
• FemBlossom by Domina Doll

Dildos

• Tantus Curve by Scarlet Lotus St. Syr
• Mr. Bendy by Marla Singer St. Syr
• Ride On by Beautiful Dreamer
• Mr. Bendy by Holden
• Cherries Jubilee by Sexorcism
• Tantus Delta by Beautiful Dreamer
• Tantus Goliath by Alpine Subdreams
• Fun Factory Marble Magnum by Sleeping Dreamer
• Raspberry Chunk by Beautiful Dreamer
• RubyGlass21 Princess by Sexorcism

Anal Toys

• Ryder by Beautiful Dreamer
• Aluminum Mini by Carrie Ann
• Pop Plugs by Sexorcism

Toys for Cocks

• Tantus Stroker by Epiphora

Lube, Massage Oil, Bath Stuff, & etc.

• Babeland Body Massage Cube by Marla Singer St. Syr
• Boy Butter by HotMoviesForHer Sex Toy Crew
• JimmyJane Beyond by HotMoviesForHer Sex Toy Crew
• Classic Erotica Sensual Products by Domina Doll

BDSM/Fetish

• Japanese Drip Candles by Marla Singer St. Syr
• Over-the-Door Cuffs by Athena Bradford
• Tantus Silicone Cock Gag by Alpine Subdreams
• Ruff Doggie Styles Serpent’s Tongue Whip by Sleeping Dreamer

Adult Books

• Down and Dirty Sex Secrets by The Duchess
• The Human Pony by Alpine Subdreams
• Best Lesbian Erotica 2009 by Essin’ Em

Adult Movies/Porn

• Tristan Taormino’s Expert Guide to Anal Pleasure for Men by Champagne and Benzedrine
• At Your Service by The Porn Librarian
• Taboo by FrzKey
• Big Abner by The Porn Librarian
• Belladonna’s Toy Box – Disc 1 by J.D. Bauchery
• Stood Up by FrzKey
• This Aint Star Trek XXX by Domina Doll
• The Opening of Misty Beethoven by Sexorcism

Storage

• FYN Adult Toybox by Marla Singer St. Syr
• Just In Case by Beautiful Dreamer

Sex Furniture

• Liberator Scoop & Wedge by Beautiful Dreamer
• Liberator Escape by Essin’ Em
• Liberator Ramp/Wedge Combo by Bad Bad Girl

Miscellaneous

• Bijoux Indiscrets Regard Indiscret by Beautiful Dreamer
• Commando Harness by Ansley Agnello
• Silky Sheets (Vanilla Fields) by True Pleasures
• Bend Over Beginner Kit by Miss KissThis

My last excursion with a Fun Factory toy was their delectable Delight Vibe, so when I got the opportunity to take another of their products out for a test-drive, courtesy of Babeland.com, I sure wasn't going to pass it up!

I wavered back and forth between Fun Factory's ribbed G Twist, with their standard dial control at the base, in subdued, fairly dignified colors, and Babeland's exclusive Boss Lady, which came with Delight-esque push button controls and an intriguing "power booster" button their standard models lack. Problem? It's ZOMGWTFPWNBBQ HOT PINK. I kind of despise pink. But in the battle of Pink vs. Power Booster, the turbo button won out, and I soon found myself fondling the radioactive pink silicone Boss Lady while waiting for my AAA batteries to charge.

Appearance & Construction Like I said, the Boss Lady is PINK. I mean, the photo here doesn't do it justice. If I didn't know better, I'd say it was some kind of solidified alien ectoplasm. It's HOLY CRAP EYE-MELTING PINK. And the most amazing thing about it is that this little powerhouse actually made me forget about the color. Or at least not mind the color so much, because it's not a color you can really forget. Seriously.

Moving on past the color, which is surprisingly easy to do, the Boss Lady is made of the absolutely bestest vibrator silicone EVER. You may think that's an exaggeration, like my description of the color perhaps, but really it's not. Feeling up the silicone was almost enough to make me forgive the color before I even turned it on. This vibe feels downright scrumptious. It's velvety and squeezable, but still firm enough to be eminently functional.

I've heard stories about Fun Factory vibrators having difficult battery compartments, and I don't know if their usual dial-control design is harder to operate than the Boss Lady, but I had no problems with the battery compartment whatsoever. While it is true that the plastic bottom end of the vibe feels like the cheapest part, construction-wise, it's certainly nothing that interferes with the function or detracts overly from the form.

Function & Features Again, like it's distant cousin the Delight, the Boss Lady comes with multiple increasingly-intense steady vibration settings, and three pulsing vibration patterns. And holy crap does it vibrate. I've never used a stand-alone insertable vibe that put out the kind of sensation this one does. I don't know how much of that is due to Fun Factory's actual motor design, and how much is down to the vibration-transmitting qualities of their irresistable silicone, but wowzers.

When I had it turned up to maximum power, I didn't think the power booster button would even be noticeable, and it maybe isn't enough of an intensity boost to really tip you over the edge if the regular settings aren't enough, but it does make for a nice little bit of variety on top of the built-in settings.

One thing to keep in mind before investing in your own Boss Lady though is the size. She's a big-un in the world of insertable vibes. At almost 7 inches insertable length and 1 3/5 in. diameter, the Boss Lady pretty much demands lube for all but the most accomodating users. Some women may find the size is too much to handle enjoyably, so do consider whether you like girthy toys before shelling out for this one. I personally considered the size an enjoyable bonus. No complaints here!

Oh, and did I mention the noise??? I think this toy has the hands-down best power-to-noise ratio of any vibrator I've ever tried. Seriously, there is no noise to complain about. I mean, of course there's a leetle buzzing, but odds are if you like it half as much as I did, you'll be making enough noise to drown the Boss Lady out!

Technique & Conclusion This vibe is designed to stimulate your g-spot, along with everything else at the same time. Unlike a lot of g-spotting toys with narrow shafts and specially angled bulbs designed to create localized g-spot stimulation, the Boss Lady's girth means everything it touches definitely feels the effect. The curved shaft and pronounced ridge along the top of the head do give the g-spot noticeable extra stimulation, but I found the vibrations near the base were so strong I could even feel the buzzing in my clit!

What probably surprised me most about this toy though, is the fact that it's also one of the best clit vibes I own. I mean, it's obviously designed primarily for insertion, but the way Fun Factory's luscious silicone transmits vibration while still being soft enough to push against without discomfort is just unbelievable … Hey, Fun Factory, if you're listening, you seriously need to make a pocket-rocket sized clit vibe with a generous bulb of this silicone on the end. I will buy it IMMEDIATELY.

While I have yet to achieve my ultimate toy goal of a mind-blowing, squirting, no-clit-vibe-needed g-spot orgasm, I will say the Boss Lady easily achieved at least mind-blowing status when accompanied right at the end by a little bit of Pocket Rocket action. This automatically elevates this toy above almost all my others, as well as a goodly percentage of my past human partners. *ahem*

Ladies, if you can get past the color (and you won't know until you see it in person, because digital imaging can not yet replicate this particular shade of pink), and you like your vibes on the larger side, I feel entirely comfortable giving the Boss Lady two thumbs up. And ten curled toes to boot.

Q: if a guy does not cum in your mouth while your giving him a blow job, could you still get an std*? ~Ashley

I put your question first, Ashley, because the answer is SO important. In a word, YES!!! Herpes can be transmitted any time the sufferer has an open herpes sore & you come in contact with it. ESPECIALLY with the delicate tissue on the inside of your mouth or vagina. Genital warts (HPV) can be transmitted by contact with the growths, even if they're too small to notice. Other STDs can be transmitted in the pre-ejaculate fluid (most often called precum) that leaks out of the end of his penis before he orgasms. My advice? Don't touch a penis if you know the guy has any kind of sexually transmitted disease or infection. And if you don't know whether or not he does, don't touch it without a condom.

Q: Hi, me and my girlfriend are pretty open minded about sex, and trying new things, now we both like oral sex a lot and we were wondering if my girlfriend swallow's my cum 2or3 times a day will there be something bad or unhealthy for her? And she likes to suck me for 30 minutes and sometimes even 1hour, is there a problem about that? And what if i make her cum (SQUIRT) because she squirts really good, i mean really a lot and she can do it a lot of times, could i swallow her squirt? Or is it unhealthy for me? And the same for her, she wants to try and swallow her own cum ~Denny

First off, RIGHT ON you two! Damn it's nice to hear from people really getting in to getting each other off like that! :-) And to answer all your questions really simply: No, there's nothing wrong, dangerous, potentially harmful, or in any way bad about any of that. Enjoy the hell out of each other, you lucky things!

Q: What if the guy your giving head to is ghard to please? like no matter what you do he wont let yuo know if he likes whats your doing than what should you do? ~baby-d

Q: okay so me && my bf are kind of in a new relationship…but we often have sex atleat once 2 twice a week. i often go down on him && dont get the favor in return…(not complaining)but even during sex && when i go down on him he makes no noises or face AT ALL! it kills me. it makes me feel like i am not doing a good job. && mentioning it to him he says…"thats just who i am." how can i change that?! ~LDC

It's hellishly frustrating when your partner won't react openly enough to let you know if they like what you're doing. Whether or not you can do anything to change it is questionable. If the guy is just uptight or insecure about his own sexual reactions, you might be able to get him to loosen up by making noises of your own while you go down, like saying "MMmmm" while his dick is in your mouth (which also causes a nice little vibration for him), or squirming around like you're really getting into it, or lifting your head once in a while to tell him how much you enjoy sucking him off.

But if that doesn't help, there are just some people who aren't that active or demonstrative while they're receiving pleasure. Which sucks, but there really isn't much you can do about it. Try not to let it bother you. If he keeps wanting you to give him blow jobs, chances are he's enjoying it.

Q: my bf cums in less then 3 mins after i give him head i dnt swallow i spit but he cums fast Does he like it? THE LAST TIME HE DID ME WAS 2 YEARS AGO WE JUST HAD A BABY BUT DAMN ~Juicy Lips

First off, if you're giving your man oral and he won't return the favor even though you really want him to, he's being a selfish shit. Second off, I'm pretty sure any time a guy comes after 3 minutes of something, he's pretty much gotta be enjoying whatever's going on during those three minutes.

Q: How do i give a wonderful blow job ~Anonymous

Check out my first blow-job post, 10 Tips for Great Fellatio, and if that doesn't give you enough ideas, just click on the Oral Sex link in the Categories list over on the right hand side of the page for more. And most of all: Have fun!

Pleasurists is a round-up of the adult product and sex toy reviews that came out in the last seven days from bloggers all around the sex blogosphere. Did you miss Pleasurists #35? Read it all here. Do you have a review for Pleasurists #37? Submit it here before Sunday July 12th at 11:59pm PDT. Please re-post this list on your own blog if listed.

Want to win some free swag? All you’ve got to do is enter.

• Birthday Giveaway! Deadline: Monday July 13th at noon Pacific Time.
• Hello Kitty Vibe photo contest Deadline: September 1, 2009.

Madame Editrix
Scarlet Lotus St. Syr

On to the reviews…

Editor’s Pick

• Striptease Kit by Kara Sutra

Vibrators

• Studded Tongue Twister by The Duchess
• AcuVibe Mini by Beautiful Dreamer
• Lovemoiselle Cecile by CarrieAnn
• LELO Iris by Thursday’s Child
• Remote Vibrating Thong by The Duchess
• Fun Factory Gallant by CarrieAnn
• AcuVibe Mini by Miss Mia
• Hello Kitty Vibe by Athena Bradford
• Orion Bottle Rocket by Dangerous Lilly
• LELO Iris by Essin’ Em
• Earth Angel by Carnivalesq
• LELO Gigi and Iris by HavingMyCake
• Slicone Intimate Diver by Adriana
• Lovemoiselle Cecile by Exploring Intimacy

Dildos

• Randy by Sinclair Sexsmith
• Lovemoiselle Noemie by HotMoviesForHer Sex Toy Crew
• Savanna’s Spiral Wrapped G-spot Wonder by Amorous Rocker
• Glo Smooth by Baby Sinead

Anal Toys

• Tantus Ryder by Sexorcism
• Tantus A-Bomb by Scott
• Romp by Epiphora
• Alumina Pace by Epiphora

Toys for Cocks

• Tenga Deep Throat Cup by Baby Sinead
• Zeus Vibrating Cockring by True Pleasures
• Hannah Harper Authentic Love Doll by Red

BDSM/Fetish

• 36 Inch Spreader Bar by Scarlet Lotus St. Syr
• Sport Cuffs by HotMoviesForHer Sex Toy Crew
• Rubber Ball Gag by Domina Doll

Adult Books/Games

• Opening Up by Essin’ Em

Adult Movies/Porn

• Fuck Me in the Bathroom #3 by Beautiful Dreamer
• Sugar High Glitter City by Nadia West
• The Art of Sex by J.D. Bauchery
• Rivals Volume 2 by The Porn Librarian
• Peters by FrzKey
• Not Bewitched XXX by J.D. Bauchery
• In Praise of Indecency by The Porn Librarian
• Butch Boi Lansing Raw by J.D. Bauchery
• Afrodite Superstar by Thursday’s Child
• Nina Hartley Private Sessions #11 by Lady Wolfdreams

Lingerie

• Cocktail Party Collar and Cuffs by Red

Storage

• Just in Case Condom Compact II by Wilhelmina Wang
• For Your Nymphomation Bigfoot Case by Red

Sex Furniture

• Liberator Fascinator Throe – Microfiber by Scarlet Lotus St. Syr
• Liberator Wedge & Ramp Combo by Sarah Estrella
• Liberator Black Label Scoop by Thursday’s Child
• Liberator Black Label Wedge/Ramp Combo by Dangerous Lilly
• Sexercise Me System by Red

Miscellaneous

• La Femme by Sleeping Dreamer

I do love my Hitachi. I love my Hitachi so very much. But sometimes the cord is just a hassle, and it's too cumbersome for partner play. So, when I spotted the more compact & rechargeable Acuvibe Mini, in Babeland's review newsletter, I just had to give it a go, and boy am I glad I did!

Appearance & Construction: Much like the Hitachi and full-size Acuvibe, the Acuvibe Mini is a utilitarian looking toy. The body is made of hard plastic, and the vibrating head sits on a short flexible neck. There's a slight nub on one side of the head, but I suspect that's more useful for actual muscle massage than for recreational purposes. Of course, it's my luck to get the pink Mini to review, because the universe has a sense of humor like that, but it also comes in a neutral bluish-gray (as shown).

The Acuvibe Mini is roughly half the size of the Hitachi, and the big, huge, tremendous advantage is the built-in rechargeable power supply. Plug it in for 8 hours when you get it, plug it in every 2–3 uses after that, and you're set. No cumbersome cord tying you to the wall.

Function & Features: The Acuvibe Mini is a basic one-speed, non-insertable vibrator. The vibration intensity is roughly equivalent to the Low setting on a Hitachi Magic Wand, but at a seemingly slower vibration frequency (which may be a good or bad thing for different users … it's mostly a neutral difference to me).

It's pretty innocuous-looking, making it appealing for partner play with guys who aren't thrilled to invite gigantic fake dicks into bed with them, and you can even sneak it between the sheets by starting out using it for an effective back massage! This little bugger is perfectly strong enough to use for innocent, legitimate massage.

And, have I mentioned it's rechargeable?! ;-) These days I really can't see any reason to make your customers mess with replacing batteries all the time. Rechargeable power supplies have really come a long way in the size/weight department.

Technique & Conclusion: Technique? Switch on, hold against skin where ever it feels good. It's blessedly fool proof.

Conclusion? Buy the Acuvibe Mini if the following list describes you…
You love your Hitachi dearly, but:

• …wish you didn't have to be within a few feet of a power outlet at all times.
• …you'd like something a little more compact (and a bit quieter) as your traveling companion.
• …want a similarly powerful but less cumbersome toy to enjoy with a good "friend".

…say hello to your vibrating knight in shining armour, the Acuvibe Mini!

Well, you don't say whether you've brought the subject up with her before or not, but my number one piece of advice is this: Don't push it! Seriously, if you have mentioned the idea to her, and she wasn't open to it, bringing it up over and over again is just going to kill any chance you may have had in the first place.

Now, there are a whole bunch of reasons someone might be against the idea of having anal sex. They may have heard it hurts (which it can, if you're not careful). They think the idea of anal sex is dirty, and something only "perverts" do. They may have religiously-based beliefs against it. Or, they may just think it's unsanitary and/or gross. They may even have tried anal before, and had a bad experience with it. The problem here is that except for reason #1, the rest are really hard to argue with, because there's really no way to prove any of them wrong.

Now, if you haven't brought up the subject yet, or her reaction wasn't completely negative, here are some things you can try doing to warm her up to the idea:

• Use your finger while you're going down. (And yes, if you want her to give up the back door, I'd consider it damn near a requirement that you do some favors for her first. ;-) When you're going down on her, and she's getting really excited, you could try gently stroking or tickling her anus with a wet finger, and see how she reacts.
• Move up slowly. If she seems to like external stimulation, the next time you could try applying some gentle pressure, and eventually getting a little lube on your finger and inserting it a little way inside. If using your finger goes well, you could buy a small butt plug, or beginner anal toy, and using that with her. Once she gets used to the idea, suggesting anal intercourse will be easier …
• Don't push your luck. The really key thing to remember is that she may only ever be willing to go as far as your finger, or a toy … or she may never be comfortable with anal stimulation at all. So, don't push it. The last thing you want to do is push her to the point where she starts resenting it. If you already have a good sex life, you wouldn't want to ruin it trying to "score" something you're never going to get in the first place.

We've tried different positions to alleviate his being too long, but what would really help if there was a sex ring that we could put on his cock during sex to "take up some space" so he wouldn't have to concentrate on going to deep and hurting me.

Is there such a thing?
-Shorty

Not to worry, Shorty. :-) You can indeed get a stretchable cock ring, and have him wear it just around the base of his shaft (rather than around both penis and scrotum, like usual). If you pick out an extra wide cock ring, it should help "take up space" just fine … and if that ring doesn't do the trick, here's a 2 inch wide cock ring that might work even better.

Of course, depending on how hard he's thrusting it's possible that those rings, when stretched around him, won't be thick enough to stop penetration, so I was looking around for something thicker that could serve the same purpose. I found an adjustable cushion and strap set designed to be used with a penis enlargement gadget. Magnum Comfort Cushions look like they'd work perfectly! They're quite thick, and fit over an included adjustable strap.

Good luck, Shorty! :-)